Lead By Example - Do As I Do?
AdventureDad | December 1
One of my favorite ways of being a good parent is to lead by example. I try to behave the same way as I want my kids to behave. This idea, which is simple, straightforward, and very effective, seems to be highly underrated today. But it’s not as easy as it sounds. I often catch myself in situations where it’s easy to see the correct behavior but where I sometimes don’t act that way. I’m sure you’ve found yourself in the following situation many times:
You’re walking up to an intersection with traffic lights and the kids are in the stroller. You’re on the sidewalk and the light is red, no crossing. But there is no traffic and you’re in a hurry. The street can be crossed safely but that would mean walking against a red light. The kids would clearly see that daddy is doing exactly what he says is forbidden. Is it alright to do it every now and then when there is no danger? How is this explained to the children, it’s fine to break the rules when it suits?
I know the correct thing to do but still struggle to always remember that the children are with me and will copy my behavior. Good and bad. But I’m surely the only one with these moral and educational issues……… Do you ever catch yourselves jaywalking with the children?
Ohhhhh, is that what red lights are for… Bossy always wondered about that…
We find that the lights are occasionally “broken” and stuck on red then we check both ways for safety and quickly get across.
That one I have never done.
But I am guilty of too many others.
I admit it, I have done it a couple of times myself. But stopped, when my daughter started calling me on it. I would rather just wait than have to spend the time explaining.
I have regretted calling it “broken” once or twice.
My daughter starts in with the “why’s” and before I know my head is ready to explode.
I did the exact same thing except this was during driving, not walking.
From the backseat my 3 yr old said “Hey! It’s not green yet!”
“I know, but it’s turning green already, and there are no cars… ” But, ugh- damage done- she saw the clear violation.
On a slightly related note, check out this approach to parenting.
http://dadthing.com/2007/12/05/tough-love-vs-spanking/