Paternity Leave - A Gift That Lasts A lifetime
AdventureDad | June 4A housewife earns no money, right? According to Salary.com that’s not the case which puts the salary of an average housewife at $134k. That number is up for much debate and some have pointed out that a dog then deserves a $125k salary. The actual figure is unimportant, at least to me, but how much is it worth to have a man at home?:-). From now on until the end of the year, possibly longer, I’m using the great Swedish benefit of fully paid paternity leave to spend time with my young children.
I enjoyed 5 months of paternity leave with our son when he was 7 months old and that was the start of a great relationship. It’s a huge privilege being able to spend 24/7 with your child for an extended amount of time without having to think about finances or getting sacked.My wife has done a great job with both our kids and showed an incredible amount of patience. Especially with our now 9-month old daughter who had colic, acid reflux, and zero patience from day one. She’s now doing fine but still a little high maintenance.
We’ve agreed on me taking over completely even though she will be doing very little work in the beginning. She has full confidence in my fatherhood abilities but it’s still a little tough (but relaxing…..) to suddenly have a spouse in charge. Especially since my style of parenting is a bit different. I look like I’m not doing a good job at all. It’s somewhat of a specialty for me, looking like crap mediocre but producing great results.
I’ve had three “real” jobs in my life and I’ve looked like crap in all of them. Professional athlete, my current Wall Street type job, and my most important job as a father. Somehow, the way I do things looks extremely unimpressive to the surroundings but produces great results. But looking like I’m not on top of things doesn’t exactly make my wife relaxed. But I’m used at doing ten things at once at work and dealing with two kids almost seems relaxing. Scary thought I know.
When my son was young we both stayed home during my paternity leave and found it exhausting. This time it’s totally different. Even though the kids are demanding all the experience from our son has made me so much more relaxed. The first time around fatherhood was filled with so much uncertainty.
Will I be this happy and cheerful after a few more months with the children at home? I don’t know but I do know how important it is to spend time together early on. The first year or so in a child’s life is a golden opportunity to build a close relationship that lasts a lifetime.
After our first son was born, I took off 8 weeks and then my husband took off another four. Paternity leave was unheard of at the time (and here, pretty much still is) but it was a fabulous experience. He kept a diary. I think his intense hands-on time with Finn so early helped shape him into the spectacular father he is today.
My husband has been a stay-at-home dad for the last couple of years and I don’t think he’d trade it. I will say that I’d have liked it if his definition of “at home” had included helping with household chores a bit sooner than it did…but I really can’t complain when our kids have had the advantage of having their own parent(s) around to care for them full time. Enjoy yourself!
How enlightened! I wish Canadian politicians could think so clearly. Due to the more or less nonexistent paternal leave legislation in Canada the following occurred to me when my son was born: the day after he was born, after being promised a week off regardless of his date of arrival, my boss called me at the hospital to inform me I had no choice but to come back to work on Monday. Enjoy your time. You are very lucky!
I think you in for the hardest and possible best experience in your life. God’s speed oh adventurous one!
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