Annie…give ME your gun
Hygiene Chronicles | November 7I love most of the programs my son watches. We’ve bonded over Bob the Builder, we’ve mourned the change from Steve to Joe and I’ve even gotten past the awkwardness of the Higglytown Heroes jumping inside each other. However, there are some characters in children’s programming that just get on my nerves.
First are the DoodleBops; Deedee, Rooney and Moe. Three idiot clown-wannabes that are the goofiest role models every created. Perhaps there may be some morals in there but I can’t past the opening to even find out.
An honorable mention is Jeff of the Wiggles, but only because of his narcolepsy. It’s getting old and I think there is probably some medication he should be taking. Otherwise, we love the show, but seriously dude, enough is enough.
But of course, the character I can tolerate the least is on the show my son loves the most, Little Einsteins. Ladies and Gentlemen, I nominate to you my most annoying character, Annie.
Annie is one of four little kids who journey through life with the help of a lap-tapping powered rocket. Their highly imaginary adventures always coincide with a piece of classical music and each kid gets to work their “talent” in conjunction with the music during this half hour show.
For the record, the premise of the show is excellent. Classical composers, positive story lines and teamwork anchor the lessons. But freaking Annie wrecks my nerves as much as not having my shoe size in stock during Nordstrom’s half yearly sale.
Girl, you totally cannot sing. I don’t care if you’re 4. I don’t care if you’re trying to help the little mouse or the little totem pole. Quincy plays freaking 19 instruments….and in tune. June can dance…not very well, but at least it’s quiet. And your brother Leo is a bit weird with his conducting, but he definitely seems to be rocket’s right-hand man. But girlfriend, you suck.
Sorry to be so blunt, but you should learn now that you have no future in music. I know it’s tough to be the Ashlee Simpson of Disney’s playhouse. And why do we never see your parents? With that singing, I’ve assumed they just left you and Leo. I know totally understand why the other Annie was orphaned.
Enough of my ranting; which characters drive you nuts?
There’s no question: it begins and ends with Dora. Honestly, are her friends hard of hearing? We’re already watching the show, she couldn’t have more of our attention. Dora needs to find her inside voice.
And she doesn’t blink.
Oh it has to be Barney (with Elmo a close second). I have made it my life’s mission not to introduce my kids to Barney.
We don’t love Barney.
I’ve never watched the Doodlebops, but this isn’t the first time I’ve heard they are boring and goofy!
My son is addicted to the Backyardigans and I think I am, too. I find myself singing the theme song when I least expect it.
Barney. Absolutely and without end, Barney. Followed by Power Rangers. These are the things not allowed in the house.
I will stomach Annie. Little Einsteins is so much easier to digest compared to the DoodleBops or The Wiggles. It also help when I learn a thing or two while watching it.
To Rocket!!
I vote for Dora. It hurts my head to hear her screaming for half an hour.
I’m a huge fan of the new show on Noggin called “The Upside Down Show”. I’ll even watch it with my son. On purpose!! They have lots of funny stuff in there for the grown ups, without being vulgar or anything. And they’re fun.
I deliberately limited the kids’ TV to things I could stomach. I cannot stomach Barney. He is the devil dressed in purple.
Elmo, while highly annoying, taught my child how to use the potty, so I now have to respect his moral authority and superior parenting skills.
Luckily, I also have my kids addicted to the Muppet Show (on DVD), and we all have fun watching that.
I just have to say that Elmo and Barney aren’t nearly as annoying as I expected them to be. The Wiggles however have something deeply disturbing going on. I can’t put my finger on it, but they make me so uncomfortable I can’t watch.
There are a lot of good things on tv. My kids love The Wonder Pets, Oswald and House. I enjoy all of them as well.
What I can’t stand is Oobi on Noggin, the hand puppet that can’t afford a sock. The “characters” on that show speak a broken form of backwards grammar that is good not for you, um. They sound like freaking Yoda but without the mad jedi skills.
I don’t mind Annie. The Teletubbies drive my wife nuts and that pointless crap is banned at our house. We limit TV time for our son but do allow him some daily Swedish children shows which are great. More old school and educational. Can’t say there are any that drive me nuts. Current favorites are Curious George, Engie Benji, Bob, and Dinosaur (I know some of those are movies but still….)
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Buona Sera,
As a grandblogfather I have to tell you that when I’m watching television with my four year old grandson there are several “characters” that make say… “ma what?” First, all of the “Wiggles” need to be hit. Barney…. HE’S PURPLE FOR CHRIST SAKES!!! Elmo should be put it the Witness Protection Prgram and just disappear.
But what bugs me the most is the characters we don’t have. How come there’s no Italian super hero characters for the kids today? You know characters with cute little names like, Barney “The Bat” Bompensiero or Elmo “Skidmarks” Molinari. You know… cute characters we all could relate to.
It’s really sad when the number one computer game for kids is “Grand Theft Auto”. Do you realize todays kids are too lazy to go out and steal an actual car?
It’s sad it really is.
Fugetaboutit!
Agreed. Doodlebops freak me out. And Jeff is just effing weird, man.
The Doodlebops *shudder* could not possibly be more annoying. They are THE WORST.
I’m with you Tony — no TV for my kid … just good ol’ timey grand theft auto for her.
Although I wish I could find older cartoons to watch with her, like He-Man or the Snorks. She’d watch TV all day if we could ever find those.
Boohbah. You cannot tell me that some serious drugs weren’t involved in the production of that show.
The doodle bobs are the most annoying thing on TV since Geraldo busted into Al Capones grave.
Oobi. Oobi creeps me right out. I’d watch a 24 hour marathon of the Teletubbies before I watched Oobi again.
I’m glad that Annie can’t sing like a professional. She’s supposed to be a little girl, the youngest of the pack, and you know, she sounds like it. Yes, her voice is annoying, but it is much less annoying than that of those overtrained child singers you hear so often. She sings because she loves to sing, not because she’s good at it. Nice.
Most annoying: The Wiggles. They are banned from our house. What drivel.
I love all of those surrogate parents on television. They give me a chance to watch the news.
I love annie, she is a sweetheart. doodlebops… if there was ever a show to show kids that it’s ‘okay to have two dads” this is it. the men are so homosexual in their mannerisms… not that there’s is anything wrong with that. but come on… even the wiggles aren’t blatantly telling everyone they are of the man -on-man persuasion.
Magic Schoolbus is great. I swear to god I learn something that I never knew every time I watch it. Handy Manny… I’m sorry but I still see Fezz from that 70’s show when I hear him talk. It will take some getting used to.
oh yeah.. bobah .. thats ia seriously an F***ed up show.
With the exception of Pocoyo, they all drive me nuts.
Even Bob the Builder with his whiney truck friends. Although I personally think Bob’s wife Wendy has an animated helper of her very own: Dilly.
“Can I pleasure you? Yes I can!!!”
“the men are so homosexual in their mannerisms… not that there’s is anything wrong with that.”
Let’s hope not, given that our son does have two dads.
Maisy, maisy, Maisy maisy Mouse.
We have mourned the passing of Steve too. Fortunately that was nearing the end of our child watching shows. We have missed the current batch. We, instead, had to put up with Barney and Lamb Chop.
Caillou. I hate that kid. I hate his parents, too. And his little sister. Caillou and Rosie whine, whine, whine about EVERYthing and the parents don’t do shit about it. No, “Caillou, when you stop whining we can talk about it.” Nothing. Just whining and tantrums. I hate them all.
I have a few deep dark hatres. The first is Barney. He was banned from the house, and never made an appearance. We had a scare when she got introduced to him at DayCare, but it quickly passed.
Max and Ruby is another one that drives me nuts. Don’t actually know why except… well it just does.
I don’t like Annie either! She’s a whiner and that makes me nuts. However, I do like the show and my son’s favorite character is Quincy. The other day I was doing a crossword puzzle and got two clues about classical composers. I never would have known them before.
We just went to see The Wiggles in concert here a couple weeks ago. It was fun.
Know who I hate. I know its a bad thing to say, but I hate Uniqua from the Backyardagains. First off its an irritating show about talking and singing and dancing animals. But what is Uniqua suppose to be? There is a penquin. Thats cool, A kangaroo Thats understandable, even a yellow hippo I am down with. But a purple WTF? And did anyone see the viking one? I mean vikings don’t say Yaaar. They burn stuff and Rape and plunder and BURN STUFF! And last I checked, Leif Erikson was not a purple WTF.
Now on a possitve note, I saw a show a little while ago called “The World Tree” or something. It featured a sloth who did Tai Chi with a monkey. It was kinda cool.
For some odd reason I find Annie’s ill-pitched singing quite endearing. My wife, on the other hand, cannot stand her. Particularly the way Annie says, “Look, look, look!” (I can hear my wife imitating it in the back of my head as I type this — please make it stop!).
For my money, the Doodlebops are the freakiest thing going on TV today. Even ahead of Barbara Walters. I just know that one of these days my son will turn on the TV and there will be Moe and Rooney declaring there love for each other (not that there’s ANYTHING wrong with that). I will admit, however, that DeeDee has a pretty good set of lungs.
As for Jeff’s narcolepsy, should we really be teaching kids that it is okay to fall asleep alone on a park bench or in a movie theater?
Oobi. I hate the fuck out of some Oobi.
i used to hate the wiggles, but my 7-month old likes to watch it, so i got over it pretty fast. my 8-year-old stepson loves spongebob, and i do, too. also, jimmy neutron is hilarious. and the grim adventures of billy and mandy is totally inappropriate, but i can’t help but laugh. it’s too adult, i decided, for him, but my husband and i sneak a peek when we can!
My wife and I have a TV free household. though we do have movies. Disney is OK here and so is Sesame Street.
Sponge Bob and Barney will never be welcome in my home…. if I have my way.
Poor Annie. I never thought about that. Next time we watch, I’ll probably notice.
Dora bugs me like no end. She and her freaky monkey.
I use to hate the Doodlebops, but since my daughter loves to watch, I just really dislike them.
Barney, Teletubbies, Boobah, Elmo, Wiggles…all would be banned if I had my way. However, getting that message through to all the aunts and grandparents is proving to be difficult. I have only caught a few minutes of Backyardigans on a day off, but they seemed cute enough. Little Einsteins I don’t mind — I just need to teach my son how to do the “pat pat pat pat” bit and we’ll be golden.
Jeff “Wiggle” not only drives me bug-nuts because of the narcolepsy (SERIOUSLY, do his “brothers” not care enough about him to GET THE MAN SOME MEDICAL ATTENTION?), but also due to the fact that he is apparently incapable of CLOSING HIS MOUTH. I’m not kidding–just watch him. Mouth. Open. All the time. Dopey, “surprised” expression. All the time. We took our daughter to see their live show a couple of years ago, and finally my husband took my binoculars away because I was just staring at Jeff, shooting him magnified death-eye-beams.
My son doesn’t like the Doodlebops which couldn’t please me more. About a year ago something they did scared the crap outta him and ever since he has shwoen no interest. I dunno something about a frog. We LOVE the discovery kids preschool shows in our home(High Five and Peep our my son’s favorites). We also enjoy Noggin and PBS Kids. I can stomach Barney and for a while he was a huge teletubbie fan didn’t bother me. The one show I really banned from our home is a show for kids a bit older Zach and Cody, I didn’t like the one kids behavior and then there was an episode where they got a bike and the bad twin wrecked it and the mom wouldn’t help mediate that pushed me over the edge.
jay jay the jet plane and company have always looked kind of like flying asses to me.
Boobah, YING YING VE VAH! I hate em I don’t even know their Names and I hate ‘em!
Teletubbies I hate because when my girls where 18 months and 2 1/2 they could talk better then them! Geesh! What are they supposed to be teaching my kids again? Communication skills???
Barney, needs to be slapped and steralized!
Noddy needs to have his bell rung!
Pingu….another I can’t understand a single word spoken! They sound like Charlie Brown’s Teacher in school. waa waah whhaaa
LAZYTOWN! Sportacus has something wrong with him! I just can’t put my finger on it!
Now I like the Backyardigans, Dragon Tales, and Zaboomafoo (Chris and Martin Crack me Up)!!!
Hey.. lighten up everyone! Remember when we were kids watching cartoons? Our parents must heve felt the same way. Think about Elmer Fudd was an idiot! Foghorn Leghorn and Betty Boop had an annoying voice. Daffy Duck was way whiney, and so was Donald Duck..must be bad to be a duck. What about Scrappy? Everyone hates him! The absolute worst had to be smurfette. Our parents must have been crawling the wall watching the smurfs. I could go on forever, but my point is that cartoon are for the children. They don’t see those annoyances, unless we force our views on them. Wait until they are the cynical, overworked, underpaid, underappreciated adults we are now. Relax and enjoy your children and know one day they will be gone and then you can watch your “Bill OReilly” or whatever! :)
ROSIE SUCKS. Caillou is annoying. The parents are idiots and extremely unhuman. Ugh. I would like to see Caillou hit Rosie. That would be cool.
Annie’s not the only one who needs her adenoids checked; so does JoJo (of JoJo’s Circus infamy). Sheesh.. thanks for the stereotype that females are whiny! Creepy Of The Week Award has to go to “Shadow” from Bear in the Big Blue House, with Tutter the Mouse being that show’s equivalent to Annie in the Most Annoying Category. Don’t you lerve the way the PC Brigade are creeping in to kids’ shows, with “Feeling Good With JoJo”, “Adventures in Nutrition with Captain Carlos” (a spoof if ever there was one!), and “Safety Patrol”! Still, there’s been some big improvements since I was a kid. Bear (ITBBH) is obviously a throwback to the old Sesame Street, but never EVER in my wildest dreams could I envisage the old SS handling potty training, LOL!
If you have to pick a most annoying Little Einstein, vote Quincy. His catchphrase every episode: “I CAN NOT BELIEVE IT!”
Believe it, Quincy. Believe it.