Parent’s Bill of Rights
Child's Play x2 | September 221) Unsolicited parenting advice shall not be offered to parents of small children.
2) Childcare providers shall not claim to have seen a major milestone prior to it being witnessed by one, but preferably both, parents.
3) No one person, without the express written consent of a child’s parent, shall introduce that child to any or all of the following: Elmo, Barney the Purple Dinosaur or the Teletubbies.
4) All parents shall use their kids as an excuse for not doing something they don’t want to do at least one time per week but not more than five times a week for fear of sounding inept.
5) All parents with children under the age of one may claim sleep deprivation as a valid excuse for just about anything, including but not limited to, falling asleep at work, wearing one grey sock and one black sock, forgetting your cup of coffee on the car roof, and just plain acting dumb.
6) All parents with children under the age of five shall be free of riducule when caught singing “Wheels on the Bus” while at work.
7) All parents, when questioned by their children, shall be able to use the phrase, “Because I said so” when they absolutely cannot think of a valid reason.
8) No parent shall be patronized by a child’s teacher or pediatrician simply because the parent advocates a different approach than said teacher or pediatrician.
9) No parent shall intimidate or threaten another person’s child unless that child is about to date your daughter.
10) No parent shall be tried in the court of public opinion for simply admitting, “I don’t know.”
I think you should start a petition and have it signed and maybe we could get this put into law.
Oh, I have one…
11) A parent who does not watch their child in a public place (ie playground, etc.) should not be surprised when another parent reprimands said child for picking on the child of the reprimanding parent.
OK, yeah, there are way to many “parents” and “childs” in that but you get it right? If you are going to allow your child to run around and behave like a hellion, completely unchecked, then I feel free to step in and correct him or her when MY child become a victim or potential victim of said rambunctious behavior. In other words - WATCH YOUR DAMN KIDS. hahaha
12) When two or more children play together, parental roles such as ‘keeping child from danger’ and ‘removing unidentified and surely disgusting object from childs mouth’ shall be transferred to the adult nearest the offending child without prior discussion or post-incident recriminations.
Oh…I’ve done #5 too many times.
I’ve gone to pick up dinner on the way home from work. Put two bags of FABULOUS mouthwatering, brow dampening take out Thai on the roof of the car while wrangling the kiddo back into his seat. Arrive at home, go in the house and freeze much like a little bunny in headlights when hubby asks where dinner is. Even though the restaurant is a good 5 miles away, I still felt the need to go check to see if it was still up there.
Thank you for making me feel sane, and almost normal!
Word.
#11 should simply read…”or else.”
In regards to suggested #11:
Where I work we have a turn-style door leading from the lobby to the outside. There was a party in the hospitality room next door and about 8 kids (ranging in age from 6-12) were messing around with the door. I went out in the lobby to tell them to knock it off and then I see one girl with her hand caught in the door, crying. All the other kids starting saying in unison “I didn’t do it! I didn’t do it!” The girl’s eyes were wide with terror and I also saw some kids trying to push the door farther, only getting her hand more caught. I finally get her wrist out when all of a sudden I see the father (of which kid, I don’t know, but he was someone’s dad) strolling around out front, just wandering back and forth. I then start angrily telling him to keep an eye on his kids and to make sure they don’t mess around in the door. He finds out about the girl and her wrist and THEN STARTS YELLING AT ME ABOUT IT! Are you kidding me? I couldn’t understand everything he was saying as he was speaking in another language but it wasn’t “Thank you very much Ma’am and I do apologize for my blatant neglect.” Grr!
Okay, so that’s my story. I’m done now.