The Pooping Principle
Genuine | July 18“You ever take a crap so big that your pants fit better?” ~ Ron White
I am not sure what the forces of nature are but my eldest son, being the only current son that is potty trained, has a funky poop schedule. The people at Big Ben set their clock by this kids poop schedule. I suppose when the only thing you will eat is French Fries and Chicken Nuggets, Fruit snacks and the occasional turkey sandwich, your body gets used to the routine.
My son does the same ritual each night at the dinner table depending on whether it’s his night to say the prayer. After we say grace, he takes one bite of whatever the above culinary regimen is, and then gets up to go for his evening constitutional. This leaves me wondering. Is he going to make room for the next batch of reconstituted mac and cheese? Are the nuggets going through his system with such clarity that room must be attributed for the next round? The funny part of this routine is that each night he gets out of his chair, Daddy walks into the response every time.
Genuine: Hey! Why are you getting up from the table?
Genuine Boy: I gotta poop.
Genuine: Oh, okay, but make sure to flush….after you wipe! (Thank God he learned to do this on his own recently.)
I go when it’s time to go. I could go once a day or depending on my own regimen, I could go 12 times a day. He goes only after that first bite of food. This is a phenomena that must be explored further. It may help me to develop a pattern that can used for the other two boys still in diapers!
Genuine Toddler: Daddy, me go poo poo too!
Genuine: Alright big guy! Where’s your Mommy?
You can set the clock by what time my daughter poops. Of course it’s always about 5 minutes before we have to go in the morning. With my son, on the other hand, it’s a (ahem) crapshoot.
I’ve been trying to keep track of when my daughter poops because of the potty training, but she’s still inconsistent and has had toddler tummy (read: loose poop) FOREVER. My son, on the other hand, is like clockwork - he finishes breakfast, I clean him up and set him down to play, and he poops within a half hour.
My daughter needs to go potty right after we sit down at dinner. I tried once to ask her to hold it and she cried cuz she had to go so bad. Maybe I will pretend its dinnertime 10 minutes before and see if she will go.
Funny you should post about this. Jake (almost 3) comes to the dinner table and messes about with his food. Won’t touch a bite and then eventually heads for the bathroom for a poo. When he comes back, it’s straight down to business with dinner.
I’d started to realise this and now, just before I bring him to the table I’ll take him to the toilet first. Works a charm.